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"Which is what you wanted?"
"You're one miserable S. O B.!"
He winked behind his shades. "Would it help to say that I know of no one else who
could have done it?"
"Sheeeeeh!"
"It's true."
"Look, Hooli." I took another tack. "Our goal was a one-on-one confrontation wherein,
hopefully, I'd blow the Kaleen away. Still, am I right in concluding that he was tactically stupid,
incapable of using his power properly?"
"His basic problem was that he'd never been taught not to play another man's game."
"Your game?"
"No, Buby, yours! The game of war in all its phases, is the game wherein you
humanoids excel. Example: jacks, tennis, soccar, all have simple rules; but all are won
primarily by physical skill. Chess, on the other hand, and war, have an almost
four-dimensional quality-time, politics; what you ate last night, etc. The logic of both must be
learned. No thinking entity, unfamiliar with the concepts, could ever expect to win the first
time out"
"As for the improper use of his power-no doubt about it. But it would have made no
difference, except in the last instance. He figured you for power. How else, in his mind,
could you have deflected lightning bolts, shifted the clouds around, blown his wizards to hell,
etc. He had decided to retain a sufficient amount of his own to take you out, with the
remainder being channeled, for his life's sake, into the gadgets. In effect, you'd have
cancelled each other out. There was always the chance that you would have blown him first.
But we couldn't risk it. So we let him see me-and told you about it!"
"You let him see you?"
"We sure did, Buby-right after we'd planted the Grail in your head. I even let him see
a piece of my mind, a bit of the potentially available 'goodies,' so to speak. I linked you to
them, too, along with the thought that it would be to his interest to keep us both alive.
"He then did what we'd thought he'd do. He was even more predictable than you. He
used his remaining power to change his form to resemble me, in order to hold you in check
for the last few critical moments."
I grunted.
"Actually," Hooli grinned. "His best weapon was himself. If he'd given you one
buggering peep at him in the original, you'd have been flat on your back with instantaneous
metabolic imbalance. In essence, if he'd only known it, he could have won-and lost, and
taken all Fregis-Camelot with him, in that order...,"
I thought about that. Then I asked curiously, "What did he look like?"
"Me, Buby! The real me! It's not too late. You can still have a peek!"
I sighed. "I'll take a rain check."
"Well, what else?" Hooli asked.
"Dahkti, Chuuk, Jindil?"
"Gone. Oh, there'll still be Pug Boos in the five northern kingdoms. After all," he
grinned, "everybody loves a Pug Boo."
"I've wondered about that."
"I'll bet you have," he exclaimed softly. "Here's an old paradigm, Kyrie. Stick it up your
personal memory bank: Where humanoids evolve there are eventually puppies in the yard,
and teddy bears in the play room."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
He was up and pirouetting. "Well you said it," he grinned over a black-gowned
shoulder. "You told your princess that except for Pug Boos, all animals on Fregis have six
legs."
"Fraggin' spit!" I said.
"That's going to change, though. From now on, Pug Boos, like Alphians, will actually
reproduce themselves."
"Bloody Buddhai" The enormity of what he was suggesting suddenly hit me.
"Sort of shakes ya, doesn't it?"
"But the Vuuns told me-"
"The Vuuns are dreamers Buby."
"Show me, damn it. Prove it!"
He did. He managed a sort of "cake walk" with sundry bumps and grinds. Then he
suddenly reached to whip his gown aside and shout: "See! No belly button!"
And sure enough his hairless tummy disclosed an area equally barren of anything
resembling the mark of a one-time umbilical attachment.
He returned with a heel-and-toe, buck-and-wing, slanted his mortar-board forward
against his shades and said softly in my ear, "It's about that time, Kyrie. I've got to go."
"Will I see you again?"
"That's hard to say. We'll try...."
"Sheeeeeh!" I shook my head.
He said, still softly, "I'll miss you, Kyrie."
"I'll miss you, too, Hooli."
He then made a couple of skating motions so that his small, round figure began to
fade. His voice came faintly- "Good-bye, Collin."
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