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flowing through the limo.
Oh, I murmured.
Thanks for ruining the surprise, she huffed.
The limo pulled in front of a comedy club and the driver opened the door to let us all out. Ryan
handed the doorman a packet of printed tickets from her purse and we were ushered inside. A few
tables upfront were blocked off and had reserved cards on them. I followed Ryan and the rest of the
girls up to the tables as a waitress came to take our drink order.
Who s performing? I asked Brandi after the waitress left.
The Wingman.
The Wingman?
Yeah, have you read his book?
Um no?
You should; it has lots of sex in it and it is funny as hell. I really liked it!
Well, let s see if I like his act first, I said, turning my attention back to the stage.
A lady by the name of Stacey Prussman did a little opening show to get the crowd ready for The
Wingman . After a few jokes, she finally started to announce James.
Are you all ready for your headliner? He s the author of The Wingman Chronicles, and his TV
pilot, The Wingman, won Best Pilot at the Hoboken International Film Festival in June 2013. Stand
up and make some noise for The Wingman , James Holeva.
James ran up on stage holding a wireless mic. He was kind of cute. His brown hair was spiked
like he had just fucked a girl in his dressing room, and she couldn t keep her hands out of his hair; it
suited him.
He removed his leather jacket and turned towards the audience. He was wearing a black t-shirt
and designer jeans that hugged him just right. Black looked good on any man. I loved when Brandon
wore black shirts. After all, the first night we danced, he wore his black pinstriped shirt that to this
day still makes me hot.
San Francisco, where are my dirty girls at tonight? he shouted into the crowd.
Girls in the crowd, including my rowdy friends, cheered and let him know that we were here.
If you act like a whore, you ll be treated like a whore. That being said, more girls should act
like whores, he said, starting his show.
James continued to perform in your face sex jokes, stories about his adventures, talking about
how girls think. He was right on a bunch of points. He definitely knew what he was talking about.
James harassed the crowd and then finally noticed our row of nine.
James turned to me. So, something tells me you girls are having a bachelorette party?
Why do you think that? Ryan yelled back at him.
Of course it was Ryan who would speak up. She always had a way with talking to men. Come to
think of it, she was the one to talk to Michael and Colin first. I wonder what their plan would have
been if we never talked to them in Vegas?
The penises around your neck, penis straws in your drinks and the Bride-to-Be sash kinda
gave it away. Usually girls at my shows end up with penises on their heads, but not until after the
show, he said, smirking at her.
The crowd and I laughed. Ryan just might have met her match.
Speaking of, he continued, where are we going after the show?
Wherever you want, my sister, Stephanie, screamed at him.
My sister was recently single. She and her boyfriend, Chris, broke up and now she was all for
having a good time. I heard for months about my bachelorette party and how she couldn t wait for it to
happen. She wanted to be free and get guy s phone numbers while we were out.
Do you like a big cock? he asked, turning towards Stephanie.
Um&
Spencer does! Audrey shouted out.
The crowd laughed again. I, on the other hand, shot my evil eyes at her. Now it was my turn.
So, is that why you re getting married? James asked me.
No, of course not.
Oh? So you re saying your man s small, but you re fucking a black guy on the side?
No way, he s& I stopped. Everyone was laughing. I didn t need to tell him and the rest of the
club about my sex life or so I thought.
Do you like to suck cock?
I laughed with the crowd. This guy was not going to back down. This is what Ryan wanted. She
wanted me to be heckled. I bet she planned this whole act. She always wanted me to open up and be
carefree, just like her.
Yes. Yes, I do. I replied.
Brandi and Jessi both choked on their drinks. Bel and Carroll screamed out, I knew it! and
Ryan and Becca just laughed and shook their heads. They already knew that part of my sex life since
we played drunk Truth or Dare. I turned to my sister; she and Audrey were laughing and clapping with
the crowd as well.
Do you? It s a bachelorette party night. One of your last nights to really party. One of your last
nights when another guy could comfortably eat your pussy, he said.
I felt my panties moisten at the word pussy . I thought about that morning and how Brandon did
nothing but just that. He liked to eat me out. Loved it, in fact. He never could get enough and neither
could I.
You know once you re married and it s six months from now, you ll have a ZZ Top concert
between your legs, he continued. When your man eats you out for your birthday, he ll be walking
around with a rug burn for a week.
Everyone including myself was laughing. I saw tears rolling down Brandi s face.
Nah, I m just fuckin with ya. You re gorgeous and he s a lucky man. So tell me what do you
like sexually? Do you like to be spanked?
Do I like to be spanked?
She does! Ryan yelled.
Since this is your last hurrah as a single woman, I think you deserve a spanking before you
leave. What do you think? he asked the crowd and turned to me for an answer.
I don t think so, I said. Spanked in front of a crowd? On stage?
Spencer, do it! Ryan yelled at me.
The rest of the girls agreed with her and I felt obligated to do it. After all, I was having a good
time. My many vodka cranberries were flowing through my veins and self preservation was out the
window.
While waiting for me to make up my mind, I heard James on stage, If a girl tells you she doesn t
like to be spanked, you re just not hitting her hard enough.
What the fuck?
Fine, I ll do it, I said, taking a huge sip of my drink before standing.
Alright, get your ass up here. I m gonna spank you like you re one of Bing Crosby s kids.
The girls cheered. What the fuck was I doing? Going to get spanked by some comedian? Granted,
he was funny and easy on the eyes, but this was not like me. This was like Ryan.
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